Most of us don’t do conflict all that well, so we usually avoid it.
(I know, I know. You’re thinking of a few folks who seem to conjure
up conflict from thin air. Understood,
but in my experience, those folks are WAY
in the minority.) Back to my point…
Conflict is OK. Really.
It can actually be quite beneficial, if
managed well.
When leaders (of families, churches, schools, businesses, ball
teams, etc.) decide to learn the skills of managing conflict effectively, then
teach/coach/model the same for those in our organizations, we stand a pretty
good chance of making our organizations stronger.
Daniel Goleman’s Emotional
Intelligence (1994) and Social
Intelligence (2006) both point us to deeper understanding of the skills for
managing conflict. While both books are
excellent reads for anyone interested in self or organizational improvement, Goleman’s assertions for effective emotional/social interaction are premised in these four elements:
- Self awareness/knowledge
- Self regulation/control
- Others awareness
- Relationship management
Really.
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